7 weird signs and symptoms you are higher As buddies

Question: What if you start dating someone, all is well, you're having a good time together — but then, one day, you realize that you're not sure you want to be romantic with them? What are the weird signs you're better as friends? Or 

what if you haven't started dating yet, but you're thinking about it, it's on the table, right, and you're wondering if you should take the plunge — if it would be a good idea — or if you should just stay friends or pursue a new friendship with this potential partner. What should you do?

Good news: I asked experts just these questions. Apparently, this is a pretty common phenomenon, and they had some great advice for anyone who has found themselves (or might someday find themselves) in such a situation, or some similar sitch. It's a common teeter-totter: Should we do this? Should we just stay friends? As everyone knows, once you take that romantic step with someone, you may never go back — and this is all the more important in cases when you've been friends forever. If the relationship doesn't work out, your friendship could be affected. Don't worry: Here are their thoughts on the signs you're actually better as pals with someone beyond the whole I-can't-imagine-being-intimate-with-them thing. But first, check out the latest episode on Bustle's Sex and Relationships podcast, I Want It That Way:

1. You Don't See Eye To Eye On Values

We can differ with BFFs on major principles, but it's harder when you're dating someone with whom you wildly differ on such things. Of course, that's totally doable too — it just presents more obstacles. "The best way to tell if you are better off as friends is [asking yourself] how much you respect their values," life coach Kali Rogers tells Bustle. "We can be friends with a lot of people with varying values, but it's totally different when you start dating them." There's a big reason for this, she adds: "Their values can easily become your values." If you have someone in your life who presses all of your buttons on important values, you might not want to get involved, even if you find yourself attracted to them. As Rogers puts it, "If you love being around someone but don't necessarily see eye to eye on things that are pretty important to you, it's best to stay friends."

2. You Feel Guilty You're Not Into Them

"If you’re dating someone who’s not your type or is incompatible, normally, you’d recognize that fact and move on without hesitation," New York–basedrelationship expert and author April Masini tells Bustle. "After all, why waste your time with someone who’s not going to be right for you?" That said, the guilt thing might be related to the fact that you actually harbor true feelings for the person you're dating — feelings of friendship. "If you start feeling guilty about not being into him [or her], it’s probably because you like him [or her] as a friend — just not as a lover," she says. Guilt is a telltale factor, and it "tells a part of the story," Masini says. "Get to the [bottom of the] rest of it by figuring out why you feel [guilt]," she says.

4. You're Comfier Hanging Out Than On Dates

"I think in this situation that if you are more comfortable just hanging out with that person than when you are on a date, the friendship card might be too strong to ignore," Rob Alex, who created Sexy Challenges and Mission Date Night with his wife, tells Bustle. "If you feel differently when you are on an official date with this person, it is time to step back and survey if your friendship with them is more valuable than a possible romantic relationship." If you've been friends for a long time, you might not want to give that comfortability up — and risk losing it permanently. "We have a bond with friends, and when we can have that friendship inside our relationship, it is magical — I know, as I have that," he adds. "However, if the relationship starts to strangle the friendship, then both situations might not be able to survive."

5. There's No Effort On Their Part

When the other person isn't really making the same effort, you should just aim for a friendship (at most), zen psychotherapist and neuromarketing strategist Michele Paiva tells Bustle. "Even if they are afraid or shy, you need someone who will get out of their comfort zone for you to make it work," she says. If you really like them, try a friendship. Or just let things go altogether and find someone who will make an effort for you.

6. You Can't Imagine A Road Trip With Them

The best, strangest way to tell that you'd be better as friends with someone: "You know that you never would want to be stuck in a car cross-country with them, because you would annoy each other too much," Stefanie Safran, Chicago's "Introductionista" and founder of Stef and the City, tells Bustle. Well, that is one way to tell! Though I'd be more of one to argue that a true friend should be just as great of a road-trip partner as a lover, it is true that some more fair-weather friends might be perfect for an afternoon brunch but not great for a weeklong trip crammed in the car. That said, I'm all for true friendship, so if you can't picture road-tripping with someone, you might do best if you aren't friends or lovers with this particular character.

7. You're Not Daydreaming About Them

Cecil Carter, CEO of dating app Lov, tells Bustle,"If you don’t find yourself thinking about them, yet you enjoy their company," you should probably stick to friendship. It's true: Like Safran, Carter points out the importance of visualization and imagination. If you aren't sitting around daydreaming about someone, you're likely not going to have a solid romance. Being in love is all about fantasy, especially at the beginning.